Pugs Gifts

"I don't see how being a pug changes things."

"Not really. I went on the green carpet just before we came out."

"I'm getting HIM a mug that says: I woke up like this!"

Walking the dog

"Pick me!"

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

"Wow. . . what's that?!"

"Okay, that's enough Physics for one day. Take a break and chase your tails."

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

Pet a Puppy

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

'We can't go on meeting like this'.

"Here's one: 'Youth Frisbee Camp', from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Tuesdays." "Naw... Go back to that first one, for 'early chewers', wasn't that one a sleep-over camp?"

"I believe we have a quorum for the meeting."

'They sure have small litters.'

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Dog Wrestling.

To them it's just a Prada handbag

"Funny, I don't remember signing up for this."

'Don't worry. I'm using carpet shampoo.'

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

'Jurassic Pork.'

"No you, he called you a lap dog."

"Fashion Week"

"I see a couch."

'I'm a guard dog too.'

"The emotional support goes both ways."

'If it's any consolation, I'm having him fixed next week.'

"Did that pig that went wee, wee, wee all the way have have foot and mouth?"

Man's best friend - Man's worst friend - Man's only friend.

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'