Puck Contract Connoisseur Gifts

'They're renegotiating their contracts with the team owner during half time.'

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

Hockey Season.

"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."

'There's really no need for confusion. Part 95 of section 33 of Article L in the contract clearly states ...'

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

"You can't quit my bridal fashion business. It says so in the prenup, I man the non-compete agreement!"

'I agreed to guide you, My contract says nothing about pulling a sleigh,'

'The team we're playing tonight is good 'cause I heard they know how to turn and stop!'

Don't forget to read the small print.

"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."

"Norman doesn't like any loose ends in his contracts, he likes everything tied up tight...it can be a problem..."

"I want the contract to say that if we win a championship of any sort, no one spills champagne on my head."

"Only three wishes, eh? Well, let's see what my lawyer has to say about that!"

"What happened to the good old days when people just breached contracts?'

Every Friday lunchtime procurement managers would gather to boast of the size of bid documents they had received that week.

Publishing Clauses Of The '90s.

'Have you not noticed that our legal department is crawling with lawyers!'

"Basically, by signing here, you consent to letting me manage any life prolonging medical treatments."

'A ground ball to deep short, handled beautifully by Santana...'

'This contract proposal needs more work. I'm not experiencing any twinges of guilt over it.'

'These are tough times to be a contract law attorney. Everything's written in stone.'

'I'm afraid, Reverend, that what the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.'

'During discovery we found five more things to bill about.'

'The fine print can be read only if held up to a mirror.'

"Damned if they do and damned if they don't? This is BRILLIANT work, everybody! Why didn't we think of this before?"

"I always find the Contract Attorney's Special amusing. The price is always in extremely fine print."

'I've brought my attorney along to read the small print.'

'But my pay rise is only in line with inflation.' - 'Yes, in Zimbabwe.'

'With the threat of ABS's competing for Council work is going to get even harder...'

"I am well aware of what my contract says Jerry but this kind of royalty is of no use to me."

"Mr. Packard will sue you now."