Publication Perfectionist Gifts

"If I learned one thing in all my years in this business, it's that you're only as good as your last earthshaking breakthrough."

"We just need to change a couple of things before we can consider publishing it...What you've said and how you said it..."

Bullseye!

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

"I’ve seen better metaphors in my litter box."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

'In,' 'Out' and 'Organize.'

'Miss Pringle, I run a tight ship! What is this piece of paper doing on my desk?'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

"It drives me MAD when people act as though we've nothing to do except write moronic memorandum."

'Why am I not surprised that this section is always the most disorganized?'

Deadlines, Inc.

Writer

Perfection

"Wallace couldn't come, but I brought some of his fussy prose."

Poetry repairman

'Our expenses have decreased 20 per cent since we started refilling our own ink jet cartridges.'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Sorry to trouble you , sir , but did you remember to sign my expenses ?'

"In this series, the artist is in dialogue with her printer."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"You're welcome."

"I think deep down he's really pleased the union has a female head for the first time..."

"Well, no wonder you can't think! There's your brain over there on the floor!"

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

A tailor measuring a jacket.

"Right here is where you lost the narrative flow."

'It's a nice font but before deciding we'd really like to see your font library.'

'I made hundreds of copies to give to all the students in my school. By the way, the color printer is out of ink.'