Public Transport Pundit Gifts

Next Train Arrival: You're better off walking

A train says 'Delays' while the board says 'On Time'

'Our fare hike will leave service at the same level, just like guess what?'

'I've got Swine Flu.'

'The train is late again. No need to worry, your ticket is valid for four days.'

'Apologies for the delay to the trains...we are busy counting our money.'

Public Money Going Down the HS2 Drain

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

Replacement Bus Spotters.

Pile of top secret files on a train. Man saying 'Is that seat free'

Cinderella waits at bus stop.

Latest Railway Marvel.

'Hey everybody, I've decided to stop doing landscape drawings, and start doing caricatures of my fellow passengers.'

The next fast train has gone.

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

HS2

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

People on the train reading each other's books - only it's the same as their own.

Comparing lottery odds with bus punctuality.

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

Bus for Giraffes.

"Don't make eye contact..."

"Please mind the gap between the train timetable and reality."

Bus Stop

'You should all be wearing helmets'

"Sorry I'm late, the crosstown is running local."

'He's said his first words...' 'Replacement bus service.'

"I took the road less travelled..."

What Holds the Subway Together?

"No more car-rides for me: He's gone all green, sold his car, bought a bike and uses public transports..."

Please Give this Seat to Someone Wealthier or More Influential

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

A Train Conductor.

Ibuses / Ibises in the form of Buses