Public Transport Humorist Gifts

Replacement Bus Service

"Sorry mate, last train's gone."

'I love the leg room.'

'The train now standing on Platform 2 should really be on the track!'

'Hi I'm on the train...still'

"Typical! - You hang around for ages and then three come at the same time...!"

"Sorry, we don't go to the middle, yet."

"Looks like the trains aren't running again."

Please Give Up This Seat To Anyone Wielding a Knife or Blunt Instrument.

Autumn of Discontent

Bus with no wheel and notice NOWHERE.

'He's got to be an idiot.'

'Would you please stop reading over my shoulder!'

Hip skater sees commuters on skateboard.

The Jitney 'Cross The Styx

'This is less stress than riding in the little clown cars.'

Auditions: To Perform at Metro Stations Today.

'No,missus- I said 'move FARTHER down the bus'!'

'Never mind the rail fare increase. I had to sell my Rolex to buy a meat and potato pie!'

Huge lady lady sitting down on a crowded bus

Jolly for Jones.

A man stumbling as his bus comes to a halt.

Grimms' Subway Tales

Transit of Venus/Venus of Transit

Fare Evader

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Queen of the Hop and the Duke of Earl."

The Uber Ride of Paul Revere

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

Straddling bus stop above a regular bus stop.

Airbus

Lex Ave Express

"I got held up in Suez."

"Excuse me, would you mind taking your portable zombie game to another carriage?"

'I don;t see how that's going to work?'

Cops on trains: 'Is that a truncheon, or are you just pleased to see me?'