Public Transit Humorist Pillows

"No, no! I just have resting perv face!"

'I don;t see how that's going to work?'

Cops on trains: 'Is that a truncheon, or are you just pleased to see me?'

"He always said commuting would kill him."

'Like a tree falling in an empty forest, he wondered if breaking wind whilst wearing headphones actually made a noise'

The Uber Ride of Paul Revere

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

The return of Miss Subways

Straddling bus stop above a regular bus stop.

Honey I'm Home

Airbus

Auditions: To Perform at Metro Stations Today.

Lex Ave Express

"Excuse me, would you mind taking your portable zombie game to another carriage?"

Metro North Entrance: Closed because it's broken.

Fare Evader

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'

'Would you please stop reading over my shoulder!'

'I'll fix you! But Good!'

'I was assured that this would be a double decker bus.'

"Cockfosters!"

Huge lady lady sitting down on a crowded bus

'Hi I'm on the train...still'

Covid-19: Mind the Gap

GOAT PATH

Oh, sorry, those were the unearthly screams of the eternally damned. I'll take it off speaker.

The Privatization of the MTA.

'Road Construction Updates. While you're on hold for the next hour, press 1 if you would like to listen to New Age Music, press 2 If you would like to listen to rap, press 3 If you would like to listen to country, press 4... '

Replacement Bus Service

Next Train 45 Minutes - 'Now the government is back in charge I'll take it with a pinch of salt.'

'Feeling a bit full my lot are packed in like commuters on the Northern line.'

'I love the leg room.'

"Looks like the trains aren't running again."

The Jitney 'Cross The Styx