Public Radio Enthusiast Pillows

". . . and I leave my whole estate to my one true companion, public radio."

"Carol—you're muttering about NPR again."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

Boombox

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

Please help: National Endowment for the Arts

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!"

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Randi Rhodes

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Michelle, this is your brother, Paul, do you copy? Over...Paul to Michelle, do you read me?...'

Rush Limbaugh, Balloon Boy.

'Stay tuned for a surprising new health study regarding...'

Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Cleveland. What's YOUR problem?! My deadbeat brother-in-law won't leave. What do I do? For six months, he's been sleeping on my couch, watching my tv, and drinking my Dr. Pepper. Excellent question. It reminds me of the time Stalin liberated Eastern Europe and then didn't leave for 44 years. You're going to need a massive arms race, a containment strategy, and Sylvester Stallone. Now he's using my toothbrush.

'PBS is weird -- they just ran an eight-hour commercial about how they never have commercials.'

'A sure-win radio talk show. People phone in with questions on existence and reality, and you respond with total silence.'

Doctor to mom about kid: 'Hey - 104.5? Your kid's temperature happens to be my favorite radio station!'

'If I was any more relaxed, I could host a NPR program.'

The reception here is awful!

John Peel

"That's not my political opinion. That's just stuff I hear on the radio."

Sir, bad news. I don't like getting bad news. A new radio program called Ask Sadie is getting huge ratings. Do I own it? That's the bad news. I see. Time to buy Ask Sadie. Queue sinister music. Can you guess?

You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! The price of oil is plummeting. So why're all my stocks doing so badly? I own 500 shares of Big-Box-Store Inc., 300 of Useless-Crudco, and 400 of Mindless-Consumerism Conglomerated. With gas prices so low, people have a lot more money to blow on consumer goods, so the market should be booming! I don't get it! First of all, oil is falling because there's too much supply. And having too much gas is never a good thing. Wait ... this isn't "Money Talk"?

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?" "Brexit." "It was historic. I'm old enough to remember before the European Union existed. I witnessed its creation. But now it's fallen apart and well then what I witnessed wasn't all that historic after all." "Way to make it all about you." "It's like it was all just one big tease."