Public Hygiene Critic Gifts

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The Cougher

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

'Yes I'm afraid this room is bugged, but don't worry, it's just Clostridium Difficile'

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

"I'm Hygienia, the good witch of the north."

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

VACCINATION REFUSAL

'We believe it was at THIS point that the species became extinct.'

MLB Owners, Players, Fans

'The new matron has contracted MRSA.'

Health Foods

The Visitor

Leaving my favorite restaurant, I note rats arriving for the night shift.

'Beware of the Dog poo'

'I thought of becoming a doctor, but you have to wash your hands all the time . . .'

"This looks like more fun than taking a bath."

'Must you eat without your shirt on? The crumbs falling into your navel are beginning to compost.'

God and Adam implement social distancing

"I'd really let myself go. I hadn't shaved in days."

Deodorant Hole. Cowboys discover a well-needed deodorant hole in the desert.

'Now that's more like it.'

'Remarkably the only fatalities from this crash were the two passengers who failed to return their trays to the upright positions.'

Health and Safety Accident

'Looks like the council might have over-engineered the safety surface.'

An overweight lazy man chooses to exercise in a car at a gym.

Mom! The maid is hiding dust under Grandma again!

"Hey, hon - they published my article."

Non-Smoking and Non-Urinating End at Swimming Pool

'Dang, I told him to take a shower before we sacrificed him to the volcano god!'

'Do you ever feel we're having too many inoculations forced on us?'

Nurse standing over difficult patient with syringe with 'tres difficile'.

"Ask your doctor if taking a pill to solve all your problems is right for you."

'Terrible mix-up at the hospital. They treated him with acupuncture.'