Public Bathroom Critic Gifts

"Stop that noise! I'm on the phone!"

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

'I thought of becoming a doctor, but you have to wash your hands all the time . . .'

"I'd really let myself go. I hadn't shaved in days."

School of Comparative Anatomy

Restroom in the stadium has goal toilet fresheners.

'Must you eat without your shirt on? The crumbs falling into your navel are beginning to compost.'

'I came for the $1.99 seafood buffet--I'm staying for the restrooms.'

'Well if they are 'laugh lines', you've got an awful lot for such a misery guts!'

Ban Low Flow Toilets.

Dog Urinals.

Gents

'This bathroom ain't big enough for the both of us.'

Push button for loud noise...

Job #1 is Doing #2 Outdoors

Your work station is a disgrace! It looks as if it hasn't been cleaned for a month. Don't blame me, I've only been here a week.

Woman looking at a vending machine for feminine hygiene products in a public restroom that reads "Unsanitary napkins".

'Initial excavations suggest an ancient civilisation that was male-dominated.'

These toilets are regularly checked by a member of staff.

"When you're through with that, there's a water cooler on seven that needs emptying."

"Darling - these shelves could do with a dust..."

Hand Drier

Drying your hands on trousers.

'No, you may not have a clean towel! Fifty other people have used that one, and you're the first to complain.'

'This one seems stuck, or the lock is broken.'

"Everything alright in there?"

Out of the shower

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

"Will you please clean your scythe?"

...I stand corrected. You don't have cavities, you have termites.

Buck Newton

"Water hot enough for you?"

"Harris might be in there awhile. . . I saw him take a four-pack of toilet paper in there with him!"

"Shouldn't you do something about that?"