Public Health Critic Gifts

"We need you to get out there and give people a false sense of normal."

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

Who gets the anti-corona vaccine?

The new normal

Female led countries handle pandemic better-study says

"I'm prescribing a patch. It will dispense meds as permitted by your insurance company."

"... and keep him off al news coverage of healthcare reforms."

'We'll see significant savings in health care costs with our new in-house operations.'

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

"Republicans, Democrats...as long as they keep getting sick, we'll be all right."

"I'd like to approve a second opinion but your HMO considers that experimental medicine."

"We are here to remove a blockage in your bank account."

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

Johnson and Johnson will pay 572 million for Opioids

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

Pay Hospital Bill Here.

'Rising health costs are the biggest drain on the economy, so I'll be laying off some of my patients.'

'I wasn't feeling ill, doctor, until I started hearing about the NHS reforms.'

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

NHS Reforms: See No Evil, Hear No Evil and Speak No Evil.

The World Pharmaceutical Corporation

Republican Healthcare

Have you drugged your child today?

'So if you DO break up which of you will be keeping the untreated patients and bankrupt hospitals?'

"Care home deaths are collateral damage, as we continue to smoke screen statistics and fire off as many war analogy's as we can muster: in our battle, war, and heroic bun fight against Corvid-19 - in this, our not so finest hour!"

"It looks like we're out of sample placebos."

Trump rally

"Whatever doesn't kill me gives me the chance to try new prescriptions."

Surgical Self-Service

'You're suffering from a lack of profit-making opportunities within the NHS.'

Government looks for new targets over GPs pay

'Yes we do have health benefits, but read the fine print. You're only allowed to get sick once every three years.'

"I couldn't afford health insurance, so I became a Christian Scientist."