Personal Hygiene Critic Gifts

"I'd really let myself go. I hadn't shaved in days."

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

The Cougher

The Brothers Grime

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

Queen Kong

You can tell when the blades get dull on your rotary nose-hair clippers.

New Twenty Blades

Wash your hands

Shaving

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

Hand Sanitiser on the Bar

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'Which one of these things is the soap?'

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

'Yes I'm afraid this room is bugged, but don't worry, it's just Clostridium Difficile'

Team medic spraying deodorant

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

A day in the life of a dish sink

'You've kept your shoes and socks on. I washed my feet yesterday.'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

'OK, here are the rules: We can't be seen by humans and can't leave droppings around, otherwise, they'll close the restaurant...'

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

'I'm playing a crowd member in the Easter pageant. I was going to play Pilate 'til I found out I'd have to wash my hands.'