Pub Pessimists Gifts

Whinge drinkers: 'Music is too loud as usual', 'You can never get a seat'.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Tom's last day.

Follow England mate, they're always crap!

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

Things can only get worse...

'We made it, Happy New Year.'

Doomsdayers recycle pamphlets in case they are wrong.

"Look, a shooting star- let's critique it!"

'I'm afraid things have to get worse before they can get even worse.'

'Look at that lunatic...'

'If you are a complete pessimist does it mean you are positively negative!'

A giant squid gets "Life Sucks" tattooed on its tentacles.

Look at the bright side. The I.R.S. says obesity is a disease, so your office visits are tax deductible.

"First they make you button your own shirt, then they make you tie your own shoes...you gotta ask yourself ? where's this all heading?"

'The bad news is the price of gas is going up. The good news is since I lost my job I've got nowhere to go anyway.'

'Sunnyside down.'

"President Elect Donald Trump was killed today. . . when he was crushed under the wight of his own ego."

"Next time you hire a futurist, don't hire a good one."

"One hundred billion workers and I'm the only one made redundant. Do you realise how unlucky that makes me feel?"

'Surprised you made it this far. No one likes a know-it-all.'

'With all the stresses and worries out there, happy hour no longer seemed to work.'

How can you tell it's a gay pub?

Hope

'For those of you who retain some shreds of optimism about peace on earth, some more bad news...'

"There'll be no fortune for the foreseeable future"

'Pub?.' 'No, I'll take a nap, it's cheaper.'

"Omigod. The entire axis of boring is in there."

"Why do you always assume the worst of people?"

Life suddenly gave lemons to Bob, a detroit engineer. Sadly, Bob did not have a chance to make lemonade.

'In an unexpected move today, the Optimists' Club gave up.'