Proud Pet Parents Gifts

"I'll lure her from the kitchen with my 'gotta pee' whimper. That's when you make your move and pinch the salmon."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

Brian was very proud of his dog.

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

'Baby's first two-step.'

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'She posted her first blog today.'

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

"He looks just like your husband."

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'You'll be getting $5,000 worth of doggy treats this week. If your owner sees the charge on his credit card, you don't know me.'