Property Market Enthusiasts Gifts

'Do you have a house for under £70 a week?' - 'Yes, and I intend to to continue living there.'

"Don't mind us - we just love looking at apartments we can't afford."

"We're going to use the 6.4 million pounds to purchase a terraced in a run down area of Huddersfield."

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

The stages of gentrification: a guide

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

"Look, son, real estate."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

Emigrating to France.

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

Home Sweet Second Home.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'