Progressive Education Supporter Gifts

'Well, you see, I went to one of those progressive medical schools with no formal classes or credits and students plan their own course of study so I never learned anything about the lungs,breathing and all that.'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

Common Core Family Therapy

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'

'Boy or girl, straight or gay - I don't care as long as it's science-literate and non-republican.'

"How do we make sure the students' voices are heard, but get them to be quiet at the same time?"

When Democrats Win, Democrats Win

'Going to school is NOT an abusive relationship!'

School administrator of the year "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

Parents teacher conference.

"I'm afraid we don't offer student loans to elementary school pupils."

'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

Banned Books

Controversial Boxes

"Class, can anyone name a Hispanic hero who used non-violent methods to win better working conditions for farmers nationwide?"

'But in the business world, failure is rewarded with big bailouts.'

Someone should stop the school from taking the webcam photos of the students. The kid's parents are suing the school. Excellent. Which means our taxes will be wasted on lawyers. Someone else should stop them! My sentiments exactly.

Family.

"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country>"

''Increase education funding'? -- You want the people to get SMART?'

'If you are always optimistic, your students will eventually surprise you.'

'May I be excused? The pressure is getting to me.'

"I feel like you're limiting me to correct answers."

"Let's see...I believe a computer will be available for your class six weeks from Friday between ten and eleven in the morning."

'Shouldn't you be marking our homework ?'

'Teacher layoffs adverted.'

"Due to budget cuts we had to combine our athletic fields."

Year Zero

"I'm sorry if my income is hurtful to you."

"And that's when she found out her master's degree only qualified her for an entry level position."

"I thought we were hosting a group of parents who wanted to complain about critical race theory and sex education. . ."

It's nice to have a positive parents' night topic. College admissions. Hearing about drugs, depression and sexually transmitted diseases gets old. The 3 downer 'Ds'. Tonight we'll discuss your kids' futures in higher education. We'll cover drugs, depression, diseases and crushing debt. Correction. 4 'Ds'.