Professional Grouch Appreciator Gifts

"Stan's not much of a morning person...then again, he's not much of and afternoon or evening person, either!"

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'I swear by my spell checker. I have a mental block for spelling. Even 'Hooqued on Foniks' didn't help.'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Art Masters as Clowns pt. 2

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

I Pagliacci

"Oh, Him? That's our IT guy."

'Puppies' at that playful stage where he likes to rearrange the furniture.'

Mediterranean Martini

Art Masters as Clowns pt. 1

"Okay, who's the wise guy elf?"

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

"...but, seriously..."

Odds 'n Ends/Odd 'n's

"...The Spirits are out at the moment, but if you'd like to leave a message...."

"Clown pirates!! Whatever you do, don't underestimate their numbers!!"

"The first step toward enlightenment is dissillusionment."

'You can't be serious.'

"There's always one kid that spoils the class picture."

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

Man reacts to being goosed. Caption: The secret work of Doberman Pinschers

'Good grief, Martha...surely I can slump into a little grouchiness occasionally.'

'Watch out for Harold Smedly...He has wandering long-reach pick up tools!..'

'Known in his youth as the 'Keister Bunny', due to the many atomic wedgies he received, Peter would become the greatest of all cottontails.'

Foolish Sid turns to look, and is immediately tackled and devoured by the duck.

I think this is the episode of "Leave It to Beaver" where Wally and Eddie chain Lumpy's car to a tree. Couldn

Uncle Murray Weekly

"It's from my Swiss account."

"I was just kidding when I said that thing they sit on is a giant chew toy. I hope you can act cute, because you're in big trouble."

Barristers playing a joke

'There there how were you to know it wasn't Jeremy Beadle.'

"With Mindfulness, one may learn to sit through all distractions."