Productivity Jester Gifts

"Yet another day to work on my nothing-to-do-list."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Where your mind & battle are los

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"This position has become very important to the company."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

In basket-case.

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

Out and In.

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

Work Parfait

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Overworked in the office

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

Multi-tasking.

What My Day Feels Like

Time Is Money

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"