Product Reviews Gifts

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

'The danger of similar packaging.'

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

Can't Touch This

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

Dreams I have had...

'Hot' and 'dog' t-shirts.

"This is what I took away from the meeting."

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

"It's not backstabbing if I tell our boss how lame you are while you're sitting here, is it?"

Performance reviews in Hell.

'I'd like to return this shredder.'

I love ewe.

Survival kit

Springtime rabbits.

"I don't care if it does have wifi. . . it's a vegetable peeler!"

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

". . . and then I realize everybody in the room has their phones set to 'ignore.'"

Anyone else think the movie was better? Book club bouncer.

Good plan, but where do I feature? You're the guy that signs approval.

Homes of the font designers

Plane Migration.

About Santa 2017.

"In a world where cockroaches are cute"

'Didn't I tell you? We've decided to go public?'

Care Home Eject Button.

"I'd love to talk. I'm on a train!"

'Five Yeas and I say no... The 'I's have it.'