Product Reviewing Gifts

"Roger takes his online product reviews VERY seriously!"

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

Can't Touch This

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

No, no, Grok, we love your creative voice! Ort is just here to do a little punch-up.

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"My best friend is my phone."

Book publishing.

Dog writes a review: 'A sublime book, I devoured it in one sitting ...'

'I preferred her in the margarine commercial.'

"I realize your steak was tough but you didn't have to make such a stink about it."

"Well, what's your recommendation?"

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

The Music Critic.

Gingerbread man sits at desk marked food editor

"Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy where the heroine's best friend is a gay man, or the gay romantic comedy where the hero's best friend is a straight woman?"

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"As your attorney, I advise you to assign blame, question motives, attack the media, THEN send your steak back to the kitchen."

Another new, really cool-looking gadget in a desperate search for a problem to solve.

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

'I'd like to return this shredder.'

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

"I don't mind if something's Shakespearean, just as long as it it's not Shakespeare."

"Writing that book was a real strain."

"How was the play!"

"What did I think about the play? About an hour too long!"

The Critic...