Product Evangelist Gifts

"Yes, but take away the rodent droppings and the occasional shard of glass, and you've still got a damn fine product."

"Ladies, gentlemen, come in and take a seat. I've decided to take this corporation in an entirely new direction."

Gullib-Os

CATCHY NAME

"I'm a pragmatist, Leon. Before I put a new product on the market, I ask myself, 'Will it sell?' "

Guitars in Heaven

The Ordered List

Computerized society.

Sun Screen Denial - I Don't burn...

I'm more than just a sauce, I'm a re-sauce.

"I'm going on Dragons Den with this, the one-brush-toothbrush."

'It's so new we don't know what it does, but nobody else has it so we're selling the hell out of it.'

'Hey, isn't that that bloke off the telly?'

Will work for manure.

"Before I share the meaning of life with Dave, let's take some calls from our viewers around the world."

A preacher of open-source software.

'And exactly how much less did it cost to implement Five Sigma instead of Six, Dwayne?'

'It gives me more energy than five grande espressos.'

'Our company's philosophy is thus. Our idealists develop ideas. Internal realists then turn these ideas into products. Finally, external realists devise pretexts for consumers to buy these products.'

'Don't play with firework(ers).'

Oli was a walking advertisement for thickening & revitalizing shampoos & conditioners.

"Well done, another winner, Haskins."

'For Heavens' sake, Murray! Corporate identity isn't bad, but do you really have to do this on every commercial spot from your company?'

'I've led an exemplary life! - when will you let me in?'

"Reboot, Robert."

'Your job is to do wonders for productivity.'

St. Peter to Darwin - "You can come in, but the book stays down there."

He says he's selling software, hardware, and underwear.

"What about a skills audit then?"

"Better to turn on a recyclable compact fluorescent bulb than to curse the brightness challenged."

Dotcom begging.

Our Fine Family of Products.

'We've been recieving Earth's TV evangelists for years.'

'Sure, you write me, but you never instant-message me.'

'Our computers are 100% gluten-free.'