Process Designer Gifts

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

Crap from the future.

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'Well, at least it has bubbles.'

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

Idle parts

Man and woman buying furniture.

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

An idea box in a shower

'Just as we finally get the industrial revolution down pat, we find ourselves in the middle of the electronic revolution.'

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

For crying out loud Simon. Would you stop trying to reinvent the drag.

Floss Street Vendor

'Would it be cruelly ironic to shape our new cholesterol medication like little eggs?'

Another new, really cool-looking gadget in a desperate search for a problem to solve.

Bureaucraze...

"We're having a lot of trouble with this model, sir - it's lasting indefinitely."

'Here it is - the world's largest miniaturization plant.'

'Sure, I cam up with fire, and the wheel, but you're only as good as your last idea.'

The packaging's becoming excessive.

'Well, you make it sound silly. All my new hybriproducts are unique and useful.'

All day I design high tech communication devices...yet at a party I'm lost without name tags.

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

"I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology."

If they can put a man on the moon, why can't they... market a roll of tape that's easy to start every time?!

'Ned thinks the inventor of the vibrating easychair should get the Nobel prize for science.'

"He thinks he's invented a fluted, or grooved, top for pill bottles so that he can tip out a single pill rather than have a cascade of them rolling about on the kitchen or bathroom floor."

Air freshener - pollution.

'How do I tell the president we're looking at an ampersand-shaped recovery? He still doesn't get the supply curve.'

Most of his innovative product ideas first saw life in his home studio.