Problem Escapist Gifts

'Don't worry, I'll get us out of here.'

Bo're'droom

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

"I think we're all agreed that we need to focus 110% on meeting strategic corporate goals."

"Water balloons... water balloons..."

"Could I please go back to the rack now?"

'I was so angry, I got up and tip-toed out of the meeting. I probably should've stomped.'

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

"I'm not lazy. I'm resting before I get tired."

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

'Take down that stupid sign! It's giving me a headache!'

'The trick is to make them feel better about themselves without actually paying them any better...'

"And in order to align the designated objectives withthe fiscally driven cross functional departmental...did you understand any of that?" "Only the blah! blah! bit."

"No, Thursday's out. How about never - is never good for you?"

"Now we'll all close our eyes and cover our ears, and the person who took the four hundred and twenty-eight million dollars will put it back."

Try out this summer's hot novels in a beach setting

"Not again!"

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

Man entering shed with beer: ?OK Son ? tell your Mum I?ve gone on a mission to Mars and I could be some time! ?

Meeting to determinet non-essential personnel.

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

"Mr. Cogdill said he won't be in today because it's 'National I Hate My Job Day'."

"With this invention...I can finally go to a time where everyday nuisances have been completely eradicated!"

Message in a bottle.

"Hon, I feel like riding out into big-sky country."

No, I distinctly heard a "soo-wee" ringtone.

A giveaway tan line...

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

"We outsourced our joyless TV dinners to a delightful couple from next door."

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

They were out of bagels...