Pro Tip Collector Pillows

"One good thing about repeating your mistakes is that you know when to cringe."

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

Teapot

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

Official Team Cap With Beard

"Is that your answer to everything? 'Chase the dot?'"

'Does my head look big in this?'

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

"I want one of those!"

"How can you say my hat is on back to front when you don't know which way I'm going to go?"

'I'm still working on the mystery of how to make a decent living with a tip jar.'

'I wish you'd buy another hat!'

Ed's Salary Cap

'ARRGH! Don't you have any self adhesive ones?'

'-and what makes YOU so sure my missus is waiting up for me?'

Octopus Baseball Fan

Turkey Dinner and gravity

'I'm sorry Rex, but since getting this new stick for Christmas, I have no further need for you.'

'This is where I keep my gum.'

Little Known Historical Fact: After regaining consciousness at the last minute, Davey Crockett's coonskin cap went on to become the Alamo's only survivor.

'We agree in principle on the need for Strategic Lapel Pin Size Reduction.'

"The applications are limitless."

In case of emergency...break glass: Crisis Manual.

'Made your point.'

"Well I thought it was obvious I would be charging a finders fee"

'Now we're going to test your reflexes.'

Tour guide: 'And there it IS folks! The start of Switzerland's spectacular snow-capped mountains!'

The Carrot and Stick.

'My, my, don't we look fetching.'

"I mostly rely on a collection of weird tips I've found on the internet."