Prisoner Support Gifts

'We've got spirit, yes we do! We've got spirit, how about you?'

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

Tic-tac-toe

"I see you haven't forgotten how to play with your balls, honey." "Thanks."

"How would you feel about inviting my family for Thanksgiving dinner?"

"My Doordash driver is at the front gate."

'I said there is a F-I-L-E in the C-A-K-E!'

CCTV on torture cage.

'-and which commandment did you break?'

''Where do you see yourself in five years'? That's a stupid question! You know darn well I'll be finishing 5-years of a 25-year sentence!'

"Good evening. My name is Puddin', and I'm a catnipoholic."

"The good thing is I've given up smoking since I've been here."

'First time you've been kenneled?'

"When I google myself, the only thing that comes up is my arrest record."

Martha Stew-Art.

Martha bakes with her new friends.

Convict playing the violin

"I love our comfortable silences."

Good News

'Who'd ever have guessed that mice do actually have rights?!'

I don

'You're in violation of the dress code, Pendleton!'

We're Not Corrupt. We're Stupid.

Prison Counselling Centre.

"Lucky for you we have good health care at this prison."

Get out of Gitmo card

"Hi, scheduling? I've only got 60 seconds, so I'll make this quick..."

'Sorry, but none of our entrees are available for takeout.'

"I look at his recent work and I see a maturity that just wasn't there in his teen-age break-ins."

Prison inmate counting sheep.

"What do you mean, 'you don't serve porridge?!"

Well, looks like retirement planning is done."

'My final request? How about 'Who Put The Overalls In Mrs. Murphy's Chaowder?''

"I told the dating service I hated the bar scene. I suppose you did, too."