Prison Anniversary Gifts

Chef bringing inmate a cake.

Saved...life is good!

Tic-tac-toe

Rent-a-car! We pick you up

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

"I stole me a pot of gold. That's how I became a Lepre-CON."

"I'm glad you're open again."

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

Angels Playing Frisbee with a Halo.

"I rescued him from a tree four years ago — still remembers me."

'Oh! She's such a pretty ba-a-by!! Yes, she is! A Pretty, pretty ba-a-a-b!...'

Sweet Jailbreak

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

Prison Wallpaper.

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

Yeah, yeah, yeah, framed by the cat - that's what we all say.

'I see that you're a fully integrated immigrant to this country.'

'I tried to give a woman the Heimlich maneuver, and it turned out she was doing the Macarena.'

"Put off the escape until tomorrow - I've only enough food in the house for one..."

"You've been avoiding me." "Have not, Uncle Mort." "For weeks, you've been dashing out of rooms as soon as I entered." "Coincidence." "What about when I knocked on your door yesterday and you jumped out the back window?" "Look, Uncle Mort, I just didn't want to go through what I went through in 1994." "I was just going to say one thing about the 30th anniversary of the OJ Simpson 'trial of the century!'" "You would think the 'trial of the century' would've been the Nuremberg trials!"

"You've got a dinner invitation."

'Sweetheart, your calls are slowing my early release.'

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

Mournapalooza

"This is our basic flush but I think your loved one would appreciate a more substantial flush."

Policemen Bill and Alf in police car.

'Forget about it, we all try it when we arrive here, but it's a concrete floor...'

'And HERE they are Ladies and Gentlemen! PUT YOUR hands together for Kenderwell Hospital's NEW BREED of Microsurgeon!'

Earl's magic show was very popular with his fellow inmates

'It was a woman. . .I was snitched by a pigeonette.'

'The warden said, no...you may not call in an interior decorator.'

'It wouldn't hurt you to visit me once in a while!'

Barnaby in Newgate

"Refusal to Obey a Police Officer. You?"