Price Humorists Gifts

"You think the movie is scary? Go price the popcorn."

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

Orchestra Class Air Guitar.

Restaurant. One thing you can still get for a single dollar is the waiter's opinion of you.

Man in Therapist office sees a sign: Therapy Is Expensive Bubble Wrap Is Cheap You Decide

Budget reaction.

First Market Decline

'The next phase in which we carve the stones ornately will cost a little more than the previous ones.'

Budget Opticians.

'I sold my house and got what I paid for it. But you bought it in 1962.'

"Sorry about the disguise.But we've had to reduce our budget for the 'witness protection programme'."

"But Kevin, why can't we have a proper jacuzzi like next door?"

'Hi, this is Wilbur Gurkenman, your real estate agent! I've found a single room apartment I think you can afford...'

Dollar sign balloon.

Be nice to Erdogan

"Believe me, you're not the first person who thought they were getting a deal by buying generic."

Harper's Cat Speaks: 'To whom it may concern: I will be cutting down on kitty treats.'

'Inflation allows us to live in a more expensive neighbourhood with even moving.'

One of Faust's lesser-known bargains.

'All these bailouts are silly - why don't they just give everybody their own ATM machines?'

'The x-rays are conclusive. We found some extra money hidden in the secret compartment of your wallet.'

'Yes, that IS a lot of money for just a spay...

How much money do you want? How much have you got?

Computer that runs on money.

Roder got a new lease on life. At a slightly higher rate.

HMRC Self-Assessment - Poor

'Tell them that, by funding our project, they agree the universe must be expanding, and that, as it expands, so must our budget!'

Caution! Contents may be horribly overpriced.

IRS, 'Try to be a little more prompt with your return next year, sir -- We almost ran out of welfare money!'

'...Or, if you're on a budget, there's always the La Brea tar pits.'

He sometimes wondered if his new trophy wife was just after his money. (Towels read 'kin' and 'next of kin').

'So, from now on, due to economic conditions, you'll be our son on a contract basis, renewable every year. Any questions?'

'Well, at $7.00 a pint, it's no wonder you don't see many rhinos in here.'

"I don't mean to minimize your problems. That's not how I make my dough."