Price-conscious Foodie Pillows

'We let our products speak for themselves. This is ‘I Can't Believe It's So Tasty And Price-Friendly In Today's Demanding Market.' '

Sale.

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

Crisis Buzz.

'Waiter, you seem to have mixed my bill up with somebody who wants to buy this restaurant.'

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

'Would you care for a drink while your food is being defrosted?'

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

Food Prices

"Tell your chef I'd like something for a refined and cultured palate. For under ten bucks."

'We're having leftovers again. Don't worry, I shaved off all the fuzzy parts. I'm going to knit you a sweater.'

'Jim gets a powerful charge from electric cars but always gets burned by the sticker shock.'

"I'm sorry, due to budget cuts we had to reduce kitchen staff."

Camper special! PORK 'N' BEANS...50 gallons...only $49.99...Limit: 3 per customer.

"Well if bread's free, and gravy's free, how about bread and gravy?"

Posh restaurant - 'We'll have the sandwiches.'

'I'm afraid we've reached the point where we have to cut out luxuries. How do you feel about food?'

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

Avocado Prices

Pizza By The Slice

Pharmacy. These days a miracle drug is one that I can afford.

'You've got to help me, Doc -- My Diner's Club card is maxed out!'

"It's become so expensive, that if I want sushi, I have to catch my own!"

'How is it health food prices always make me feel sick as a parrot?'

Thrift: Sew your mouth shut before going to a restaurant.

Please give! Buying organic food doesn't come cheap.

'What an uncanny coincidence! The starter, main course, dessert and wine you've ordered are all the cheapest on the menu!'

"Overpriced to astronomical, sir."

"And remember, if you can't pronounce it, I can't afford it!"

"Why did you tell them we are vegetarians?

'Considering the state of our finances, maybe you should order the hock.'

'Doesn't your business have a policy where if you son't deliver the pizza within a half-hour it's free?'

"Your meat is too expensive. Aren't you passing your 'free range' savings onto the customer?"

Man walks by a cafe with a sign saying "Lunch buffet - All you can stomach $12.95"