Press Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Journalist with a 'Press Pass' being put in a laundry press.

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

Trappist Monk Discord

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'I really wish you guys would knock that off.'

The Current Separation of Church and State Explained.

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

Jack London

'What does it say, Dad?'

'In a surprise move, Greece decided to peg its currency against the Baklava.'

New York Corruption - Auditor Watson's Death, and Suspicions on Broadway Works Project

HELLth Food Sprouts

'Hi. Due to the regulation fervor, I'm one of the clowns from Washington here to tell you how to run your business.'

'Steve says that he doesn't understand why the liberals are so glum! They already have a majority.'

"So, Mr Canary, I see you have experience as a mine safety specialist..."

Totalitarian Humour

Vladimir Putin Pulling Trump Across The Table By His Tie

Prostate: 51st State

Donald Trump Tells a Joke...

'You say you're willing to start at the bottom...'

'That's correct Shaun. The government is comprised of 5 branches...the executive, legislative, judicial, lobbyist and media.'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

"Actually, you do have a racist bone in your body."

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

"How is it in Russia?"

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

"Ok, ok, climate change is not a hoax!"

Clone Factory

"And, if elected, I promise to put more black people in cartoons."

"This swamp is much too beautiful to drain.".