Preparing For A Baby Gifts

'...and this is our cheapest fertility treatment.'

'We will need a hi-chair, a car seat, a crib, a play pen and a dressing table.'

'We want to be ready for when he starts to read.'

'Nest Accessories.'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"They grow up so fast."

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

'I told you it would be useful.'

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

"I'd like to get my hands on whoever coined the phrase 'sleeps like a baby'."

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

'She's just great with the children.'

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."