Baby Preparation Gifts

She Had Enough To Drink.

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Madonna of the Pukes.

Pool attached to child's bed.

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

"Same old same old. How about you?"

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

'I'm not too sure about that.'

"That is one absorbent nappy."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Sitting Up'

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

"Mother nature sure is confusing...she gives me a clothes line but no clothes!"

A postwoman delivers mail together with her baby who is riding in the letter carrier.

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

'No creamed peas for me today!'

"I wouldn’t say they’re user-friendly."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

'Eddy! Can you check that recall list on the toy website again to see if this swing is included?'

Baby reaching food using building blocks.

"I didn't realise it could be so complicated!"

Preparing for a new arrival

Baby reading 'To do list'.

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

"I've recorded every noise my baby makes, so that when he's older I can play it back and he can tell me what he was trying to say. . .!"

What if Pirates Were Born With Their Wooden Leg?

Maternity Hospital