Prenatal Navigator Gifts

Birthing Ball

What did I tell you about covering your bottom when you sneeze?

The Life of Pi

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

A Preschool of Fish

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

'I almost get out the door and then my mom yells...'Don't you know it's February?!' And here I am again...looking like an eskimo.'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

"Funny, I don't remember signing up for this."

"My inner child feels threatened by my inner baby."

'How many fingers do you see?'

"Why, Mr. Larsen! We were about ready to give up on you."

Completely out of diapers and facing a seven-hour layover, Marsha happens upon a diaper scalper.

'You can go home today, but we'd like to run a few more tests on your husband.'

Daisy Diaper Service

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

'Our computer responds to voice commands, but our kids don't.'

"You're six years old and I'm your mother! - I'm SUPPOSED to impose my moral standards on you!"

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'Turn everything off...we've sprung a leak!'

Mono-Tasking, Multi-Tasking, No-No Tasking and Nada Tasking.

"There's got to be an easier way to lie around the house."

Number Phobia.

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

"...Mom, can you get me a glass of wine?"

"I think this end is loaded."

'No offence. The other breast and I seemed to click.'

"I couldn't find the off switch."

'Sleeping like a baby'

"It took some figuring, but I think I figured out how to handle a temperamental teenager."