Prehistoric Romantics Gifts

'It's called 'marriage' -- it's part of the New Morality.'

"What's a patent?"

Ancient Racing

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

The discovery of asparagus.

"Admit it, we're lost."

65 Million Years Ago

Another Theory as to Why Dinosaurs became Extinct.

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

The Evolution Of Man.

'What distinguishes man from the lower animals is the ability to make tools.'

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"

'Your 'marriage' invention sounds good, but what if it leads to a concentration of power for the central government?'

"Great, just great! And while you're in here, potchkeeing around with paint, Seymour Rabinowitz in the cave next door is inventing fire already!"

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

A caveman rubs two sticks together and gets a computer.

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

'I'm tired of playing 'Rock, rock rock'.'

'We froze him until medical science knows how to cure spear wounds.'

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

Unfortunately, napkins hadn't been invented yet, so good ideas were quickly forgotten.

'I just invented the 'chair' - It relieves lower back pain!'

"Your wheel idea was a huge hit, so what have you got for me this time?"

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

'Much to his disappointment, Thag's coffee percolator was an invention ahead of its time.

'It was fun to make bujt don't see any possible use for it in the future.'

The Land Before Mimes.

"Oooh... bacon!"

'Please don't be hurt, Dad, but I've decided to go into gathering instead of hunting.'

"It's a giant banana but is it an organic giant banana?"

'I'm afraid this is going to lead to regulation of my invention.'

'- and what makes you think they must have been TALL?'