Prehistoric Parody Gifts

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

Ideas Ahead of their Time

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

Early on-line shopping

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

A prehistoric football match.

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

'You can't believe a word he says since he invented the subjunctive.'

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

"Is it free-range?"

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

Carbon Dating

'We had seven gloriously happy years together, and then he learned how to talk.'

'...You're just not built to take selfies.'

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

"Google Earth must have a defective camera. There's a big red spot above our location."

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

"Hey Arthur, check it out, a shooting star. That's a sure sign of luck, my friend."

"I like the idea, but is it scaleable?"

'Do you mind if I share your post on my wall?'

'Yea, I give away the fire. I make my money on insurance.'

'They're called 'numbers' -- Now we can have public opinion polls!'