Prayerful Soul Pillows

'God bless daddy, mommy, sis and that golf course I bought with dad's credit card.'

"... and God bless my mom and her courage to call this food."

Trilby - 'May heaven go with her!'

'Last guy up blow out the candles.'

'God, grant me all that I deserve. Amen'

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."

"Amen. Please help me up."

"Dear God, can you please reboot 2020... the one you sent had a virus."

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

Drive-thru Church

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

"Sure, I pray all the time... English test, Math test, History test...."

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

'I have a math test tomorrow, Sir, and I could use a godsend multiplicationwise.'

When you get worried, and you can't sleep, count your blessings instead of sheep...

"And please let Alan Greenspan accept the things he cannot change, give him the courage to change the things he can and the wisdom to know the difference."

'You've got plenty of time for a little prayer before you get to him.'

"Do you believe in love at first orgasm?"

"I'm going to have to make this quick, God. I just ask that you watch over me during my double knee replacement tomorrow."

"Are we allowed to pray?"

Put it in writing!

'And if this food does what I think it will - may we all meet in Heaven.'

How to Succeed in Business - Strategy 2: Build relationships at the highest level.

"And God, if it isn't too much trouble, please clean the printhead."

"Robert prays for the answers."

Exercise for the end of the day...

"Dear God, what's the meaning of knife."

'Your prayers may be monitored for quality assurance.'

'Mr. Turtle is interested in 'Single Prayer Health Insurance'...'

Pray now - Go later.

'Do you mind if I pray just this once?'

California: In Case of Fire Break Glass and Dial A Prayer.

Amen

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