Prayerful Pugilist Gifts

Boxer receives the last rites before his fight.

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

Drive-thru Church

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

"Wake up! Brother Billy's finished praying."

"Well, Mom, I guess you saw what happened."

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'Work the jab! Move your feet! Attack, attack, attack! ...But be careful. He's got a human shield.'

'Soon as your endorphins kick in, you'll feel great.'

Put it in writing!

'I know I can count on you... that's the problem.'

"The hardest thing about winning bouts? The other guy's fists."

'I think things went wrong for me in the fifth round.' 'In hindsight, was that a good time to begin meditating?'

'Such petulance!'

"...and forget your damn sensitivity training."

'I don't think his fists can take much more of the punishment your head's inflicting on them.'

Thanks God!

'Supervisor of the Year'

'Darling. Let's get the Gustavssons over this weekend for some more bare knuckle boxing.'

'Let him go.' - 'No, he'll hit me again.'

A boxer uses a punching bag while he has broken legs.

'You sure this is allowed?.'

"The hardest thing about winning bouts? The other guy's fists."

'I don't understand - he's just as strong as ever.'

Wordplay: Shock Absorber.

Shadow Punch

"You'd better cool it. Remember what he did to you last time."

"Don't even think of going over my head Brother James!"

"Er, no. He's out at the moment."

Monk at prayer, "and take care, if anything happens to you we're sunk!"

'I don't understand it. He's just as strong as ever.'

'Yes, you have to say a prayer of thanks for the shrimp. Just a little one.'

'Where is this so called 'wild man' of yours, then?'

"My husband's ill, so I'm standing in for him."