Prairie Ponderer Gifts

Prairie guys

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

Dog Igloo.

"Oh goody! It's just like the Columbian Exposition of 1893."

"What's with kids nowadays? Walking upright's not good enough for you?"

'Are you sure we should do all this praying on Sunday? -- I thought it was God's day off.'

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

'Eve ate the apple, and she's asking if you want to make it two out of three with oranges and bananas?'

Why not get God's fax number, and just fax him my prayer?

"As slim as your chances are for salvation, it's nice to see you keep trying."

'We're cutting you some slack because you just died but normally we frown on devil's food.'

God answers what He thought were worldwide prayers for peas.

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'Though we must innovate, and though we must grow, we must never lose sight of our core mediocrities.'

Fracking Zone - Be prepared for anything.

Dorothy finds the Yellow brick road is now a 6-lane expressway.

"Well, it certainly explains why everyone's so nice!"

"NO I DON'T THINK YOU NEED LEGAL REPRESENTATION WHEN SAYING YOUR PRAYERS."

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

Various Birds of Pray.

Self Service Island

'If nothing sticks to Teflon, how come Teflon sticks to the pan?'

'Hi, my name is Eve. Where is the mall?'

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Polar Bear Desert Island

'...Well if this is heaven, why aren't you using a Mac?'

Not so heavenly

Clouds getting into angel's shoes.