Powerpoint Pro Gifts

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'My pitch was going great until I let my guard down and somebody managed to squeeze a word in edgewise!'

"And as my chart clearly shows, I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"This part we still need to iron out."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

In basket-case.

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"Who wants to hear a funny story about the third quarter?"

"Whereas we used to display losses in shocking and offensive red, we now display them in warm and comforting toasted almond."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"One of the most compelling graphic presentations I've ever seen!"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

Worker ant's To Do list.

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

"For cryin' out loud, Frank, we don't have all day! Cut to the cheese!"

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

'I won't lower myself to the level of my opponent.'

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

Bottom line, is that the sweet smell of success or your aftershave?