Powerpoint Presentation Pro Gifts

"I made impossibly long PowerPoint presentations. You?"

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

"Whereas we used to display losses in shocking and offensive red, we now display them in warm and comforting toasted almond."

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"One of the most compelling graphic presentations I've ever seen!"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

"Are you sure you want to present your ideas in the form of an airplane?"

Worker ant's To Do list.

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

"For cryin' out loud, Frank, we don't have all day! Cut to the cheese!"

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

'I won't lower myself to the level of my opponent.'

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

Bottom line, is that the sweet smell of success or your aftershave?

"You need to take the weak parts of your presentation and work them into something that won't get you fired."

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.