Poultry Ponderers T-Shirts

"Let's just agree to disagree." "I suggested that first!"

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

"It's a beautiful world out there, just waiting to be discovered. Well, discovered by one of you, the rest will almost certainly die."

"Get out of my face!"

"Go ahead. Fly through it. I dare you."

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

'White meat or dark?'

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

'I can't shake off this feeling we're being watched.'

"So you found an enormous truffle and still you weren't happy."

Human meat.

"You've got to understand, in my family Dad was the poodle and Mom was the pit bull."

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

"Yes, there will be questions but you're unquestionably the nation's most badass mom."

Walking on Water

"I love the part when they scream, 'Hey! That's no log!'..."

Fish Food

"Who's next?"

This could be interesting...

'My hay fever is really acting up.'

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Square root of chicken is egg.

'I bark, therefore I am.'

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

"We're not so different, you and I."

Wow! — this discredits all my theories.

'Happy Xmas!'

'He's made of polly-ethelene.'