Poultry Pet Lover Gifts

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

The Rooster Comedian.

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Silence of the Chickens...

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"OK, now another guy found a feather in his soup! One of you is molting, and I need to know who!"

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

'Can he come out and play?'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"I'm going to prepare a special dish for Thanksgiving dinner."

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

'Tasty bird.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

A classic example of Poultry in Motion.

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

'How do you prepare your chicken?' 'We just tell 'em they're gonna die.'

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken replies: 'I'm free-range pal, I can go where I like.'

'So, the egg WAS first.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

Stonehens

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

Drink it! We've all had to sacrifice our kids for our careers in one way or another... And besides, you need the protein, Rock.

'Hey, look at this beauty... Man, I love those crunchy, well tanned sweethearts!'

"Maybe we'd kiss better if we had lips."