Potion Critic T-Shirts

"Oh, this is terrible! I love it!"

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

'Needs salt!'

Newt sale

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"Eye of pie...a**e of rat...p**s of newt."

'Alright, throw in your resume and the 'Get A Job' potion will be complete.'

Witch's Brew.

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

'Take two eyes of newt, and call me in the morning.'

Apothecary. Tell us what ails you. We'll concoct a chemical mix to dissolve in water which will fix you. Every problem has solution!

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

Where did you learn alchemy? Elementary school.

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

'What I call a miracle drug is one that doesn't start a government investigation.'

These drug will cost you an arm and a leg...the good news is, my wife and I own stock in the company that makes them.

"I trust him - he has a science background."

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

"I dunno...ask him."

'Try my health brew...1% fat, no cholesterol, high fiber and low sodium.'

Witch reading book titled 'How to turn someone into a voter."

"You know, the yoozh. A little toil, a little trouble."

"Good news - we're merging with Pinetree Pharma. They make the cures for all the harm our drugs do."

Prescription Drugs '96.

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"I've thrown in some prescription drugs that don't interact well."

'..and one for the pot.'

'He's picture perfect, alright, but the negative leaves a little to be desired.'

"Abra-Viagra."

'Human clinical trials start in six months. Sooner if we run out of mice.'

'The problem is that you're overmedicated. Luckily there are drugs that can help with that.'