Postcard Collecting Gifts

Travel Scenes

Fake News: Dear Mam and Dad....Lovely and sunny here, must dash all pubs giving free beer....

Hello from the lakes!

Wish you were steer!

'Hurry, Andrea, here comes the hunk mail!'

" - then write 'having a lovely time, wish you were here'..."

Billy. The Kid.

"The Englishman goes to the beach once a year to shed his skin."

"The Eggsorcist"

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

Fish evolving: 'Write, if you establish a niche.'

I love Museum Shops

Excess Baggage: You send emails from exotic places just to make your friends jealous.

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

'The kids are grown and gone now, but they always keep in touch.'

"You can always count on me."

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

"Just pick some. No one expects a postcard to reflect your personal aesthetic."

Middle Age: When rolling out of bed is easy, but getting up off the floor isn't!

Postcards from Heaven...

'I'd like three dozen friendship cards -- this war has gone on long enough.'

A bill poster pasting up a wanted poster of himself.

'Neat photo Lucy, I'll put it up in my room... Do you have any drawing pins?'

'I want one that says 'get lost' but includes a pocket compass.'

'Still no Christmas card from the Pope? - We did send HIM once, didn't we?'

'Needs some underarm protection!!'

I'm sending myself three Valentine's cards...that should keep my hubby on his toes!

'You know how you can never be bothered to read Tim and Sue's postcards?'

Marilyn Manson Fan.

"My little brother's almost all better. Can I get half-off?"

'Our flight will be delayed a little long, but in the mean time the flight attendants will be offering post cards to send to your friends and family members.'

'The check is in the mail...'

Wanted for Stick Up

'Come over here, Miss Twiggle. I want to dictate a postcard.'

'Look closer -- the get-well card IS your insurance payment.'