Postal Worker Comedy Fan Gifts

Postman and dog

'Apparently, Smith's desk just couldn't withstand the weight of the paperwork we piled on his desk.'

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

"Benign so far."

'With the firm growing at the speed it has there are bound to be a few problems...'

"Good news, chief, a computer virus destroyed all our documents."

"You're an overweight, overpaid, over-the-hill senior executive, Dalrymple. What did you have in mind to remedy that situation?"

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

"He was much more effective in the field."

'I take it you're looking to some extra hours!'

"Thank God your mother didn't live to see what you've become."

"Go on in—he's expecting you."

"There's the mailman!"

Frank abuses the Power of Attorney.

"First of all, kudos on landing a corner office."

"Can money buy happiness? Certainly not the amount I'm paying you."

'Accounting has suggested we standardize our billing procedure.'

'Be careful opening this...it's marked dangerous goods.'

"Sir, Human Resources has clogged the organic waste bins with burned out workers again!"

'Due to company cutbacks, you won't be getting that raise. However, to earn extra money, I can hire you to wash my corporate jet.'

"I can't believe that cat got promoted over me."

"There is no 'I' in 'team', however there are several 'I's in 'I'm the boss and you do what I say'."

'Why did you leave your last job?' 'You would too, if they sold your desk and changed all the locks!'

Bunny express,

"'Scuse me, Guv. . . Is this 2B or not 2B?"

'Say, you've been working out!' A Weiner dog bites mail carrier on the butt.

Department of Sanitation: In Bin and Out Bin.

"Is this what happens when management fails to deal with a passive aggressive member of staff..?"

"The computer in the main office says you need to be fired but it didn't say why."

Drac, I gotta have a better office if I'm gonna market your Tomato Juice.