Postal Fan Gifts

'I'ld like to return my Junk Male.'

'Oh, I'm sorry Frank, it's just when you come home in that outfit, sometimes I lose control... so anyways, when's dinner?'

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

'Grrrr....'

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

"I don’t know … there’s a small part of me that just wants to erase my childhood."

Inuit post arriving by parachute.

"There's the mailman!"

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

"Ordered fifty-eight days ago and it's here already!"

Penfriend

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure you're single-handedly keeping the U.S. postal service in business."

U. S. MAIL, 'Daddy's home!'

U. S. POST OFFICE, ''Fragile'? Yeah, yeah, pal -- they're all fragile.'

Envelopes.

'Sure I can do same day service.'

"I've been sent to rub you out pal..."

Letter On Its Way From Omaha To New York

'We'll email the new offer just to make sure you get it.'

Postman delivering post

'No, I mean, what's a 'letter'?'

US POSTAL SERVICE

Man pushes stalled car off railroad track just in time! (sort of)

Passengers in the window of an envelope are lead by a pilot in the stamp.

"I just had a communications nightmare! I dreamt that the postal workers were on strike, the internet was down and someone had eaten the carrier pigeons!"

'He saved stamps for thirty years, then one day he was in the mail and gone.'