Portion Control Specialist Gifts

"I'm Roberto, and I'll be your waiter this evening. This is Carl. He's in charge of portion control."

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'What I like best about a magnum of Champagne is, it's a controlled portion.'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

All-Day Breakfast

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

"They should have quit after deep dish."

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"Now I wish we hadn't ordered all those appetizers."

"I'm here to warn you, do not eat both slices of cake – you're going to want one tomorrow."

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."

"I'm on a diet. Mini-size it!"

"I avoid the 3 'Bs' when I'm dieting - boxes, buckets and bags."

Yes, I Want Fries With That.

I find that I can cut back on calories if I use only one chopstick.

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

I told you we should have split a meal.

"My father always said...eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince...and dinner like a beggar."

Go large or go home!

'I'll pay double for half as much.'

"You asked me to keep a food diary, this is last week's!"

"Who had the Lumberjack fruit cup?"

"I don't know why I put weight on, I hardly eat enough to keep a sparrow alive."

Birthday Cakes for Dieters...

"I'm glad you enjoyed your meal, Sir. Did you save some room for shame?"

"Just a heads-up... when you count calories, high score doesn't win."ories/high score

"Just one menu for us, please. We don't want to overeat."

Actually, it's healthier to eat smaller meals more often throughout the day.

'To help me stay on my diet, I've hired a portion control officer.'

Diet Food...& lots of it

"It's only 5 calories a serving...but a serving is a crumb."

'You are what you eat!'

Portions of a thin and fat man.

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'