Pork Rind Aficionado Gifts

"How did you get a bruise from eating hot pork rinds?"

Jurassic Pork

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"Let's see, we bought the giant pop corn, tow giant sodas, and a big box of candy. . . we were lucky the megaplex's loan department was open!"

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

'Mom, where does bacon come from?'

'Check out the rack on this hot babe.'

Where Summer Sausage Comes From...

"A trough full of food, mud to roll around in: Who cares if we can't fly..."

'I've fallen in love and i've fallen in porage and believe me: porage is better.'

Swine flu

Cooked rare.

It wasn't until years later that anyone would think to pop it.

Reading Goldilocks - 'I know you don't like porridge, but bears eat anything.'

Baby sucks cork on Australian's bush hat.

Pig Cheese

Although rejected by his peers, Slim continued to escape slaughter through diet and exercise.

"He's being bred for Hawaiian pizza!"

'Man, this guy's killing me!'

"I told him he's going to regret it, but what can I do? He's eighteen now."

'Is it slop yet?'

Commodities Exchange. Around here, unloading 50 tons of pork bellies is not a physically demanding task.

"...and the farmers - what would they do without me?...wait, don't answer that!"

Stay at Home Yellowstone.

'Common cold? We thought you said 'caramel corn!''

"We got that nasty appendix out Mr. Arnold and I hope you don't mind, but we took a couple of spare ribs as well.

Pork bellies 3 times a day...cookbook for the commodities investor.

'We want to give him the best possible life before we slaughter him.'

'Rats, even this flying carpet we bought on the internet doesn't work! We're really not meant to fly...'

"Hog Hell"

"Sure Dad, pigs can't fly, but to be precise, can't fly unaided! There are always planes, helicopters, gliders and hot air balloons to consider..."

"We offer video games, snacks, t-shirts, coffee mugs, beer and wine. Oh, and we also we have a movie."

Back Alley Bacon