Poolside Jester Gifts

"Thank goodness, I'm saved! I've been floating out here lost in the middle of the pool for hours."

"You don't need a mask, I filled it with hand sanitizer." (man swimming in a pool, inviting in another person who is wearing a mask)

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

'Is the water cold?'

'Mom! -- Spot's skinny-dipping again!'

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

'Honey, you can't keep running to Daddy every time you find a little bug or something in your pool!'

"Really? Not much of a challenge here."

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

Hands off my IP

"It's nice to see John finally relaxing."

Swim meet - sharks vs. humans

'... Get set... Wait! We forgot the water!'

'I'm just not feeling sufficiently incentivised today.'

Fully decked out in his new skimmer-Boy Mike was able to skim the pool in just 60 seconds,

Fisherman catches swimmer.

'OK, you wanted to shoot a game of pool and I wanted to lay by the pool. The main thing is that we're here together.'

"He's really awfully attractive, for twenty-eight."

No petting in the pool!

"Bloody GPS-plotter is going silly again!"

'Is it just me, or does this water feel unnaturally warm?'

The vacation rental agency is saying technically that's a "lap pool," so we can't get our money back.

Shark in the swimming pool.

'Yes, this is the deep end.'

It was a bad day for Mr Effervescent

Tentacle attacking diver.

"Tell your dad we offer adult lessons."

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!

'Ha! Fake out!'

"Everyone has to start somewhere."

Bomb's Away

'Don't press so hard, I almost drowned back there!'

"...You shouldn't by any chance be missing one of your animals?"