Pool Admiral Gifts

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

Driverless cars rage.

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

Though both are long retired, his faithful Indian companion continues to dispense sage advice to an increasingly skeptical masked man.

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

'Is the water cold?'

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Dog playing snooker/pool.

Snorkeling: A Dollar A Minute

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

"Okay, we get it. You're descended from wolves."

"Really? Not much of a challenge here."

"My, it feels good to sit down."

CONGRATULATIONS On an awesome swim

'He runs this firm like a ship.'

Horatio Nelson

Baptism - "Actually he's quite looking forward to it."

Bishop playing pool, "I like his unholier than thou attitude."

'Maybe if you make it smaller, put something soft on the end and come up with a better name than 'Cue-Tip'...'

'General, You look pale this morning...' - 'I had a nightmare Admiral! I dreamed the war began!'

Exempli Gratia.

Portrait of an admiral spying on the nude portrait next to his.

Birds cue ball escape.

"Good news, your yacht club membership has arrived!"

'I should tell you that I lied when I said sense of humour was what I look for most in a man.'

"What kind of naval blockade is this?"

Relax, you are now floating in hydrochloric acid...

Naval Power of England and France