Policy Cynic Gifts

'He's an inspiration to us all -- he evaded the draft, taxes, AND questions.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

Government a la Carte

"...Our extensive in house survey found that 82% of you think in house surveys are a waste of time."

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

This is not the time to be restructuring the NHS in the middle of a pandemic Mr. Hancock!

The wrecking crew!

Studied the Constitution. Didn't like it.

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

'I suppose they call it the rat race because only rats ever seem to win.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Jesus Christ, Health Insurance CEO

"Taxation with representation hasn't worked out so well." (two men at the US capital talking taxes and politics)

"Let's use the dog's prescription. His refills are cheaper."

"Lets get 100% behind the boss."

Dolestart - A New Initiative

'The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. That's a wonderful mission statement.'

'We can't cut entitlements for federal employees. We're federal employees.'

New Boss, Same as the Old Dictator

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

Comments. Complaints. Constitutional Amendments.

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

"I'm back from Russia. Putin offered me a Dacha to say he's an honest man."

"Dear, if the news stresses you out so much, turn it off!"

'Voodoo economics was bad enough, but this voodoo foreign policy....'

"Call me crazy, but this guy is really starting to worry me..."

Can't Vote/Why Vote?

"The government is adamant that a policy of removing income support from lone parents with children over 7 is in the best interests of the treasury."

"As I understand, we stop refugees making dangerous journeys to a safe countey and offer them safe passage to a dangerous one..."

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

Labour moderates rallying cry.