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"Alright, I'll talk. Just please, stop with the good-cop, ab-cop routine."

'Hmm, tastes like chicken, you say? Funny how you would be familiar with the taste of chicken. Detective Burns, I think we've found our murderer.'

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

Fish mobsters.

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

The old good-cop, psycho-cop routine.

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."

"Paper or plastic?"

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

Al Pacino

"Make it look like an accident"

"It doesn't look much like a 'witty painting' now, does it sir?"

"It's a beautiful day except for the murders."

"Sorry, Boss, I thought you wanted me to make it look like an accident."

"Me? A retired canine officer. They let me go when they found out I couldn't smell fear any more."

Handcuffs.

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

'...Just goes to show you, you can't trust anyone.'

Why did the chicken cross the mafia

Sketches by Boz - A Pickpocket Being Wheelbarrowed to Police Station

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